


Breathe

by orphan_account



Series: Two Sides of The Same Coin [1]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: 'john isnt gay', M/M, lmao is that a joke
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-17
Updated: 2015-06-17
Packaged: 2018-04-04 19:23:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4149843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Please...just don't be dead."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Breathe

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Kitsunechan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kitsunechan/gifts).



_Author's Note: Another fic for Kitsune-Chan :3 She wanted some Johnlock, so i thought, fuck it. Might as well break everyone's heart while i'm at it. Also, my series 'Two Sides of The Same Coin' is going to be for all my Merlin and Sherlock fanfictions. Yup. Hella._

_Enjoy! <3_

 

  _ **Breathe**_

 

 "Please...Just don't be dead."

 

 John knew that Sherlock was dead. He knew. He knew that he would never be able to see him again [except for at the cemetery] and that he wouldn't be able to go to crime scenes with him anymore. John knew that Sherlock wouldn't be there to play his violin, do weird science experiments with body parts that he wasn't sure how he got, or to insult Anderson on just...breathing. He would pray to the god he didn't believe in every night that he would just suddenly wake up, and realize that everything was just a bad dream and Sherlock was okay. 

 It was like that for the first few weeks, that is.

 But after the first month of his death, and talking to his therapist, he began to feel differently. John began to feel angry, angry that Sherlock would leave him alone like that. Angry that he wasn't alive, like it was a choice in the first place; everyone died. But Sherlock did it on _purpose_.

 And it was like that for the next two months. Anger. Simply _anger_.

 

 "Go see him, dear. You've barely been out in days."

 "I'm fine, Ms.Hudson."

 She put a gentle arm on his shoulder. "I know, i know you are. Here." 

 The landlady brought a red rose to John and placed it into his hand.

 

 A red rose?

 

 A red rose meant love.

 

 John didn't love Sherlock like that.

 

 He didn't even bother saying he wasn't _gay_. There was no use anymore. It didn't matter.

 

 

 

 "I...i met someone," John said, his voice low. "Her name is Mary. I think you'd like her. We're going on a date tonight, and... i thought i'd stop by before i went." He looked down at the grave, SHERLOCK HOLMES engraved on the stone. John sighed. "I hate you, so....so much," His voice cracked, as he reached into his pocket. "It'll never be the same without you."

 He fiddled with the rose, now in his hands. He placed it ontop of the withered, dead flowers with a frown.

 "...And i cared about you so damn much."

 

 

 Sherlock was always there. He was there the first day that John had stopped by the grave, the day that he screamed at it, the day he put the red rose down... he was always there. He made sure to have time to at least try and come by for awhile. And sometimes when John would stay and talk mindlessly for hours, he would sit behind a tree and listen.

 He was there the time John said 'i hate you,' and he was there when he said 'i love you.' He was there when he would talk about dates with Mary and the fact that he was going to ask for her hand in marriage.

 Maybe it was the fact that he was done with his mission, or the fact that John was getting married that he finally decided to come back to John.

 He couldnt make up his mind.


End file.
